I'm not exaggerating when I say that re-watching all 12 seasons of The Real Housewives of New York City has saved me during Covid-19. Nothing will distract you from the state of the world more than grown women screaming at each other over who gets the biggest room in the mansion.
I have become so invested in these women that I dedicated time to researching all of their astrological placements to find out what makes them so entertaining. The results shocked me more than Aviva slamming her prosthetic leg against the table at Le Cirque.
Let's get started!
If you want to be a Real Housewife of New York City... Be a Virgo or a Sagittarius
Sagittarius I understand... they're fun-loving, adventurous, blunt, and always down to party. A winning combination for this show. Truly nothing brings me more joy than an over-served Dorinda or Sonja; they're here to have fun and tell the truth (but make it nice!)
Virgos, however, are the Zodiac's resident caretakers. They're giving, detail-oriented, hard-working, and reliable. Definitely not the type of people I would imagine enjoying being in the spotlight on a reality TV show. My hypothesis is that while Virgos seem like steady and easy-going individuals (and they are), they can also be brutally honest, intense, perfectionists who will explode when they hit their breaking point. When Virgos are faced with injustice or irrational behavior, they can't help but say something and fight for what they believe is right and boy is there a lot of irrational behavior on this show!
Carole is the perfect example, she's laidback, charming, and moderate until something triggers her and then she can throw down with the best of 'em. You don't want to be in an argument with a hyper-rational, passionate, angry Virgo.
If you only want to be on one season of RHONY... Have a lot of air in your chart
Hi Cindy and Jules!
Both Cindy and Jules (AKA the women who barely made it through one season) have a ton of air placements in their charts and air signs just aren't here for the drama. Natural peacemakers, air signs either aim to resolve conflict or simply rise above it and not deal with it at all.
We love you, peacemaking air signs, but you just don't make good TV next to women willing to fight over literally anything... even cabaret.
What do all of these women have in common? Hint: A lot!
GUYS. 82% of the women who have been on RHONY have more than one chart placement in Virgo and 70% have more than 2 placements in Virgo! Since when are Virgos bringing the crazy energy?! Does this prove my hypothesis?!
It makes sense that Virgo's energy would contribute to nit-picking, debating, and explosive fights in the face of anything illogical or 'wrong'. Virgos have high standards for themselves and everyone around them, so when their energy is mixed with a whole lot of Sagittarius and Gemini, you get a cast full of funny, volatile women.
58% of women on this show have their moon in either Sagittarius or Gemini. These moon placements are engaging, energetic, and uninhibited. You know the girl who's always getting together with people, going on spontaneous trips, and having a great time 24/7? Her moon is probably in Sagittarius or Gemini.
To round out the formula for entertaining, passionate women, we have 24% of the RHONY cast with Mercury in Taurus (every good show needs some stubborn energy), 24% with Venus in Scorpio (possessive and zealous? Yep, gotta have that), and 24% with Jupiter in Aries (assertive go getters? Check!)
What do you get when you put all of that together? Good TV.
Let's talk about our 'All Stars'...
What do Ramona, Luann, Sonja, and Bethenny have in common?
Actually, not much. These gals each bring something unique and necessary to the show, and that's why we love them so much! (Bethenny please come back... I miss you...)
Let's break it down...
Oh Ramona and her 'Singer Stinger' (AKA all of her Scorpio placements). You love her, you hate her, you can't get enough of her. She's been on all 12 seasons of the show and no matter how angry I get with her, I can't imagine the show without her.
Ramona's Sun, Moon, and Mercury placements are all fixed signs. She's passionate, she knows what she wants, and she's going to get it by any means necessary. With so many Scorpio placements, it's no surprise that she's so driven, intense, and honest. Her Taurus moon contributes to the hardworking, loyal, and demanding Ramona we know and love. While she comes across as stubborn and hard to handle, she also has a soft side. Ramona's Mars is in Pisces, meaning she's more sensitive than she lets on. People with Mars in Pisces are intuitive, caring individuals who love to channel their energy into creative endeavors. Say what you want about Ramona, but she is incredibly loyal and compassionate to those in her inner circle AND she has a wide range of creative projects that she has made successful.
I have so much to say about The Countess I could write and entire post about it.
Luann is complicated, though she would never want anyone to know it! Her Sun and Moon are in grounded, ambitious Taurus and her Mars is in hardworking, reliable Virgo which clash with her Moon in Sagittarius and Venus and Jupiter in Gemini. Where Taurus is steadfast and stubborn, Sagittarius and Gemini are unpredictable and open-minded. Luann is constantly torn between wanting a simple, routine life and wanting a life filled with adventure. While Luann has a wide-range of skillsets, ambitious, and the work ethic to achieve anything she sets her mind to, she also has a lot of conflict within herself. When all of the negative traits of her placements get together (Taurus' hatred of authority, Virgo's critical side, Sagittarius' recklessness, and Gemini's habit of being two-faced) it's a recipe for disaster. It's all about balance, Countess! Or should I say, vivre une vie équilibrée!
Sonja the Sagittarius queen! Girlfriend has four Sag placements and she's letting it all hang out (literally and figuratively).
Sonja is a pretty solid representation of Sagittarius. She's fun-loving, spontaneous, witty, honest, and scatterbrained. Sagittarius love to perform and make people laugh almost as much as they love a good party. They are refreshingly open-minded and philosophical, always willing to talk at length about any topic. While unpredictable, you can always expect to have a great time with a Sagittarius. Sonja brings the fun, chaotic energy that is so crucial to the show's success.
Now let's talk about Sonja's Moon in Pisces! This explains so much... like Sonja's emotional attachments to her home, ex-relationships, and friendships. She is spiritual, creative, and very connected to her emotions. Pisces, like Sagittarius, is a mutable sign. Compared to the other ladies' intense energy, Sonja's easy-going nature is a breath of fresh air.
QUEEN B! Bethenny is my favorite housewife of all time. She is ambitious, funny, smart, and fiercely committed to the truth and I can't get enough of it. Whether she's making a joke, working, or fighting, she goes big or she goes home. (Or in the case of The Berkshires, she goes big then goes home...)
It's no surprise that Bethenny has five Scorpio placements. Her intense personality, fierce pursuit of the truth, deep emotions, and sharp tongue all scream Scorpio. Bethenny's Moon is in calculating, aspiring Capricorn which shares a lot of characteristics with Scorpio. Both Scorpio and Capricorn want to come across as tough and together and they have a difficult time processing and expressing their emotions. Pair that with a Libra Mars that cares deeply for the underdog and fairness in general and you have Bethenny!
And that concludes my in-depth analysis of The Real Housewives of New York!
I have so many questions for you guys...
Are you a Virgo or someone with Virgo placements?! Can you confirm or deny my hypothesis, please!
Which housewife do you relate to most?
What Real Housewives cast should I do next?!
DM me here and let me know :)